I was raised to fear nothing or no one but God … it didn’t matter what or who it was — man, woman, lion, bear or J.Lo singing a capella — my mother and father instilled in me an understanding that there was nothing on this earth capable of invoking real fear within me.
And while I still carry those life lessons with me, there was one thing that managed to slip through my impenetrable fear force field. You see, as I got older and wiser in the ways of women, I learned that they use a few choice words that are capable of … well … they’re capable of inducing a considerable level of “concern” within me.
Some might label my concern as “fear,” but those people are dead to me now.
Anyway, I wanted to share the following points that accurately summarize some of the most dangerous, deadly words used by women. Pay close attention … and, if she uses one of these on you, then I’ll see you on the other side.
Take note … and try not to let fear get the best of you. (Special thanks to Caveman Circus.)
This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right, and you need to shut up.
2) Five Minutes
If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. “Five minutes” is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with “nothing” usually end in “fine.”
4) Go Ahead.
This is a dare, not permission. Don’t Do It!
5) Loud Sigh
This is actually not a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing there and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of “Nothing.”)
6) That’s OK.
This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. “That’s OK” means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
A woman is thanking you. Do not question or faint, just say, “You’re welcome.” (I want to add in a clause here: This is true, unless she says “Thanks a lot.” Now, that is PURE sarcasm, and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say, “You’re welcome” in this scenario because that will bring on a “Whatever.”)
8 ) Whatever
This is a woman’s way of saying “F– YOU!”
9) Don’t worry about it. I got it.
Another dangerous statement, this means there is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking, “What’s wrong?” For the woman’s response, refer to #3.
**DeWayne Rogers is the author of The Fly Guy Chronicles; love advice will never be the same.