One of my mother’s favorite TV shows used to be Bill Cosby’s “Kids Say the Darndest Things.” I can still remember how the off-the-wall comments by the kids used to make her laugh uncontrollably. Sadly, that show is now canceled, so my mom is resigned to watching old DVDs of Akeelah and the Bee, and Madea Goes To Applebee’s (or whatever Madea is doing nowadays.)
Today though, I’ll be glad to let my mother know that kids are still capable of saying some pretty crazy things, as evidenced by the following quotes from kids who were asked their thoughts on love, dating and marriage.
Truth be told, some of them seem to have a better understanding of relationships than many of us. Check out their thoughts, and enjoy.
1. HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHOM TO MARRY?
You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming.
— Alan, age 10
No person really decides before they grow up who they’re going to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you’re stuck with.
– Kristen, age 10
2. WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?
Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then.
— Camille, age 10
3. HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?
You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids.
— Derrick, age 8
4. WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MOM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?
Both don’t want any more kids.
— Lori, age 8
5. WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?
Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough.
— Lynnette, age 8
On the first date, they just tell each other lies and that usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date.
— Martin, age 10
6. WHEN IS IT OK TO KISS SOMEONE?
When they’re rich.
— Pam, age 7
The law says you have to be 18, so I wouldn’t want to mess with that.
— Curt, age 7
The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should marry them and have kids with them. It’s the right thing to do.
— Howard, age 8
7. IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?
It’s better for girls to be single, but not for boys. Boys need someone to clean up after them.
— Anita, age 9
8. HOW WOULD THE WORLD BE DIFFERENT IF PEOPLE DIDN’T GET MARRIED?
There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn’t there?
— Kelvin, age 8
And the #1 Favorite is…
9. HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?
Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a dump truck.
— Ricky, age 10
** DeWayne Rogers is the author of The Fly Guy Chronicles … love advice will never be the same.