Are you the life of the party or a Debbie Downer?

Debbie Downer Depressed Cheer up shutterstock_274392413
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“Debbie Downer” is one of my favorite “SNL” skits. Played by Rachel Dratch, Debbie Downer shows up at group outings, birthday parties, even “The Happiest Place on Earth” and brings up every bit of negative, pessimistic, cynical information she can muster, bringing down the whole atmosphere. Hence the name, “Debbie Downer.”


The reason that skit is so funny is because it’s so true. We all know people like Debbie Downer. People who are quick to point out everything that can go wrong instead of considering what can go right. People who revel in pointing out others’ shortcomings or failures. People who are swift at giving criticism but slow at giving praise.


Debbie Downers are draining. I limit my time around them.

I am a big reader of biographies, autobiographies or memoirs of people who are great and have done great things. Of those people who are successful, accomplished and highly regarded, most of them have the same thing in common: they were/are positive people.


If they came across a problem, they found answers. They didn’t sit and wallow in the problem for too long.

They were doers. They had goals. They didn’t sit back and criticize what others were doing.

They were motivated. They got over speed bumps and they encouraged others to do the same.

They took risks. They didn’t play it safe, stay with what was familiar, and make fun of other people for being “different.”

They were grateful. They didn’t focus on lack, but appreciated where they were until they got to the next step.

Positive people see possibility. Those are the kinds of people I like to be around. Their energy is contagious in a good way. I understand that things happen, life gets hard and you’re not always in the mood to be happy. Neither am I. But being negative doesn’t help.

Debbie Downers hold themselves back, and if you spend too much time around them, they can hold you back, too. And not just in real life, I’m also talking about your snarky friends on Twitter, your cynical friends on Facebook, and your pessimistic friends in your extended circle. Keep mindful of how much time you spend around them.

The next time you have a party, let Debbie Downer stay home.

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