Mental health advocate Terrie Williams says ‘Black pain’ is real for Black men

Terrie Williams (courtesy photo)
Terrie Williams (courtesy photo)

The growing racial divide in our country, a catalyst for the Black Lives Matter movement, has prompted mental health advocate Terrie M. Williams to remind us our positive mental health is at stake.

“To begin the healing process, we must be honest and candid in our discussions about race relations in America. We, as a nation, must begin to peel off our layers. People of color are traumatized and flatlining … spiritually, mentally and emotionally. We can’t afford to remain silent. Together, we must share our journey in order to facilitate healing. We have the power to make a difference and change the hearts and minds of the indifferent. Healing starts with us now! We matter. … Black lives matter,” says Williams.


Williams is the author of the critically acclaimed book, Black Pain: It Just Looks Like We’re Not Hurting. She was recently featured on a video segment for HuffPost Black Voices entitled “Self-Care in Times of Black Trauma”, where she offered her expertise on how violence disproportionately affects African Americans’ mental health and highlighted ways to practice self-care.

With the deaths of Alton Sterling and Philando Castile at the hands of police officers, the Dallas shootings, and the “historical adversity, which includes slavery, sharecropping and race-based exclusion from health, educational, social and economic resources, translates into socioeconomic disparities experienced by African Americans today. Socioeconomic status, in turn, is linked to mental health. People who are impoverished, homeless, incarcerated or have substance abuse problems are at higher risk for poor mental health,” according to Mental Health America.


Williams adds, “Black pain means we’re hurting and there are a unique set of circumstances that impact us. It makes it really more challenging. I say it often. I think the hardest job in America is to be a Black man, particularly if one is dark complexioned. So often people find them more intimidating than others. It’s just what is. There are things that we do to make ourselves less intimidating – a self awareness. We will lower our voice. We will make eye contact. There are literally people who change their demeanor because they know they are intimidating to others.”

Since penning her book, Black Pain (2008), Williams is credited with starting an unprecedented national dialogue that recounts her personal struggles with depression and the impact the stigma of mental illnesses have particularly on the African American community.

Despite progress we thought we made, racism is still quite prevalent and impacts us more than we care to admit.

“We Black folks need to be more open about counseling and therapy. It’s a gift that we give ourselves. There are slights that we experience as part of our lives. If you don’t speak about it, then it can eat your soul and spirit,” Williams advises. “It takes something out of you when you change who you are to be acceptable and less threatening unless you have a sense of self. Those are things that chip away at your psyche. If you go through the world making those adjustments, these transgressions, how do you get up the next day like you didn’t just have that experience?”

Stigma and judgment prevents Black/African Americans from seeking treatment for their mental illnesses. Or something we take for granted, money for treatment.

On how we can make a difference  …

Be aware of your surroundings. Be mindful that sometimes you are the only one acknowledging this beautiful, dark skinned brother. Black and whites are fearful of him. As one moves through the world, smile at somebody, ask “How [are] you doing?” It makes a difference.

How much more dialogue can we have?

I believe very strongly that counseling for many may be prohibitive; there are places where people can go for free counseling. It is very necessary. It starts from the day we are born. All of us have inherited the unresolved pain, wounds, trauma and scars of our parents. The pain continues and nobody gets help.

I just remember I was speaking to a class of 35 students and shared my own experience with depression and this kid gets up and volunteers that he stabbed a young man. He didn’t kill him. It was so telling when he said I wasn’t even mad at him. He was very clear. So many things happen to us and the person who ends up wounded or killed has what did they do? How many times will that happen that someone will hurt or kill somebody else when, “he wasn’t even the one I was mad at.” You just don’t know. That was so deep that he admitted to that.

When I walk down 125th Street in Harlem, I will smile at a brother because I know that so many people fear them won’t look them in the eye or smile at them. It’s because I want them to know that you are loved. You never know where the other person is coming from.

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