The backlash against Tiger Woods infidelity hasn’t really happened. The media is enjoying the tawdry details, but the general population’s reaction seems to waver between apathy and bemusement — but very little outrage. An athlete cheating on his wife is hardly an anomaly, no matter how many different ways media sites try to spin the story for maximum shock value.
But there is a sector of the population that treats the constant parade of fair-skinned, tow-headed mistresses as affirmation of a long-held stereotype about black athletes: they prefer white women.
Tiger had already committed sin No. 1 — he married a white woman. After that, many sisters wrote him off as the typical sellout sports millionaire, and as many will tell you, a lot of black women will never look at a black man the same once he “crosses over.” It’s treated as the ultimate act of betrayal.
But where is that indignation when it comes to black men who blatantly disrespect, degrade and dehumanize black women? And, no, I don’t mean via the lyrics of a song — we all know that, given the right timing and need for a PC sound-bite, almost everyone is happy to jump on the necks of rappers for using four-letter words and having scantily-clad women in their videos.
R&B singers Chris Brown and R. Kelly haven’t missed a beat in their respective careers. Despite child molestation charges, and an infamous video showing what strongly appears to be Kelly having sex with and urinating in the mouth of a 13-year-old, the poorly nicknamed “Pied Piper of R&B” has enjoyed continued multiplatinum sales and sold-out tours around the country. Throngs of black women still shell out money to help make this man rich, and he’s never done a second of prison time or community service.
Brown beat his then-girlfriend, pop star Rihanna, to a bloody pulp in February 2009, did a few hours of community service — and is set to drop a highly anticipated comeback album, less than 10 months after the incident.
How can we rail against misogynistic lyrics and images, crucify any black male entertainer who dares even look at a non-black woman, and then blindly support abusers just because they happen to be talented?
Think about your daughters buying these records. What are you teaching them? –todd williams
Single Black Females in L.A.: Where Are All The Good Black Men?
Recently I took a trip to Los Angeles and it was as lovely as always. Sunny, 80-degree days and warm, breezy evenings in late November coupled with trendy hot spots and beautiful people give the city a paradise kind of feel.
But while I was there, I remembered why I moved in the first place. I was single and had lived in L.A. for a year and the chances of finding romance and getting involved in a relationship looked bleak. While several other factors contributed to the move across country, I moved mainly to avoid being alone forever.
Finding a man in L.A. who contradicts the vacuous, self-absorbed athlete or entertainer pretty boy who is into black women is damn near impossible. If a man fitting this description does exist in the City of Angels — where is he?
I met one young woman, Danielle who is also considering moving from L.A. to the Washington, D.C. area. She is exuberant, smart and attractive — and yes, still single. “L.A. men are not even approaching me, they’re waiting around. They’ll say that they don’t like these black women, they don’t like these overbearing women but then they lay back and let women do all the work. … It’s like, you can’t win for losing,” laments Danielle.
After a recent visit to the Washington, D.C., area, Danielle has her mind set on moving to that locale. “I probably wouldn’t like the winters there, but I would put up with [them] … to have a family and there is a man who’s looking to build a family,” said Danielle.
Although I’m still single in Atlanta, I have gone on twice the number of dates that I did in California — and with men who actually measure up to my standards. Moving may not be the answer for everyone looking for love but sometimes being in the right place at the right time might help. –iesha daniels
What Tiger Woods and Chris Brown Tragically Have in Common
Former R&B heartthrob Chris Brown and golf megastar Tiger Woods have become their very own public relations nightmares. Brown had a fiery mental meltdown in public over the weekend — yet again — and Woods’ alleged mistresses continue to leak damning information about their sexual dalliances. Both have taken actions that have caused irreparable damage to their once pristine images. And both can’t seem to get out of their own way as each and every move they make seems to compound their problems.
Over the weekend, Chris Brown issued a profanity-laced tirade on Twitter because he falsely believed that a Walmart store in Connecticut did not carry his new album, Graffiti. After the release of those obscene tweets, Brown announced he would discontinue his Twitter account.
Both Woods and Brown are celebrity icons whose public personas have mutated grotesquely in recent weeks and months, respectively. Both are black men (although Woods tried in vain to minimize the importance of his African ancestry), who as a cultural subset have been long-despised and feared and traditionally portrayed as violent, oversexed and ill-tempered animals who lust after what they are forbidden to have — white women and fair-skinned beauties.
When Brown entered a Wallingford, Conn., Walmart and didn’t see copies of his album on the shelves, Brown responded with this explosive comment on Twitter: “They didn’t even have my album in the back — not on the shlves,[sic] saw for myself,” he typed in a series of tweets. “I’m tired of this s—. Major stores are blackballing my CD, not stocking the shelves and lying to customers. What the f— do I gotta do.”
As if Brown couldn’t go any further, he tweeted out a few more missiles: “I’m not biting my tongue about s— else. The industry can kiss my a–,” he wrote. “WTF — yah, [sic] I said it and I ain’t retracting s—“
Brown was on a roll now, saying he talked to the manager and railed about the fact that Alicia Keys’ albums are already stocked and ready to go for her release. After the disgraced singer finished regurgitating on his own shoes, Walmart officials told the media that his albums were not on the shelves because they had sold out of the shipped copies and would be receiving more. Another Walmart executive said Brown’s Graffiti album is being sold in all of their U.S. stores.
This is one area where Brown may want to follow Woods’ lead. After the singer’s accusations that Oprah stabbed him in the back and the slew of senseless media interviews to counter Rihanna’s claims, Brown may want to be like Tiger and be quiet.
–terry shropshire
