How can we forget the movie Antwone Fisher? This movie addressed a very difficult issue for blacks in America, which is sexual abuse. I used to work in the Georgia prison system, and I’ll never forget the number of males who were sexually abused by other male family members. Yes, people … this behavior has been present — in our communities and churches — for generations. Bishop T.D. Jakes calls them “generational” curses.
This is a very touchy subject. The fact is that our young black males become very angry as a result of unresolved sexual trauma.
Now, in regards to CNN anchor Don Lemon’s confession that he was abused as a child, the pattern and process his abuser used sounds very similar to what Bishop Eddie L. Long’s accusers allege (I.e. long distance trips, remarks such as “oh, this does not make you gay …”). Thank you Don Lemon for “jarring the floor” and raising consciousness about the issue. You’re not the only one, but your bravery deserves commendation and applause.
This issue needs to be confronted head-on. I polled 50 middle-aged black men to see why sexual abuse seems to be so devastating in our community, particularly in the case of Long. The results are as follows:
- 50 percent stated that many people have been aware of these types of behaviors in our churches for years.
- 23 percent stated that this is old news, and wondered why all the rhetoric and focus was on Bishop Long.
- 20 percent thought it was extortion, and was retaliation as a result of a “Sugar Daddy gone bad.”
- 7 percent would plead the Fifth and wait until more facts surfaced.
Young New Birth Missionary Baptist Church members John Campbell III, Gabrielle Richards and Gary Foster Jr., all expressed support for Long in the conversation with Lemon, but they seemed to have an overly idealized view of their pastor. This is a common but scary occurrence in the black church. And let’s not forget: young females have also been abused in the church (time for you, too, to jar the floor, ladies).
The allegations against Bishop Long are most likely disheartening because some have experienced or testified to being sexually abused in the church. I can’t begin to tell you the astronomical numbers of confessions I’ve heard in my practice, but, even more interesting, many of the assailants have never been exposed … not by the victims, the parents or other clergymen. This phenomenon of sexual abuse in the black community and church may explain why the anger and blame are so strong in Long’s case. Brothers (and sisters): seek help! Communicate with someone; if you have been sexually abused, don’t let this ticking time bomb of frustration explode.
Is this an important topic for us to discuss? Is it time for us to “Jar the Floor?” Do you think that the above blog post explains some of the anger in the community? Let me hear your thoughts.
You may also have feelings of depression from sexual abuse and not know it. One way to be sure is to take the Dr. Owens Mental Health Prescreen Assessment and check your mental status. Remember … we are here for you!
