Sade, born Helen Folasade Adu, entered our lives over 25 years ago. Don’t you remember, being up late watching “Video Soul” with Donnie Simpson and Sherry Carter on BET, sometime around late February, 1984? Those rich red lips and that jet black braided ponytail … the mere recollection stirs me deeply. Most viewers — young and mature — were probably thinking, “Who is this exotic lady that has me mesmerized like this?”
Well, after all these years, we still know very little about the Nigerian-born beauty personally, but professionally we know her very well and have had a love affair with her that makes us breathlessly await her every move. We may not have realized it then, but she had a very firm grasp on being in love.
In keeping with Valentine’s Day, here are 15 reasons couples should love Sade:
1. “Your Love is King,” kicked the whole thing off. Her haunting vocals drizzled over her band’s buttery smooth accompaniment had us hooked instantly. A common question in social circles was “You heard that new Sade?” I didn’t quite know what love was at the time, but this mysterious lady told me mine was “king.” Sold! And if that wasn’t enough ego stroking, she told me I was a giving her the …
2. “Sweetest Taboo.” She was really feeling me: “You give me the sweetest taboo, that’s why I’m in love in with you …” She was teaching the value of building up your mate. I was coming into my own and feeling myself a little bit, so I started taking her for granted. She then told me I was a…
2. “Smooth Operator.” I relaxed into the harmonious delivery of her revelation, and really wasn’t concerned. “His eyes are like angels, but his heart is cold. No need to ask. He’s a smooth operator …” but, that meant she was no fool, as many women aren’t, and was on to me and my indifference. Despite that, she led with her heart …
3. “Is it a Crime,” revealed the unapologetic lover in Sade, while some of us were still trying to figure out what love was. “Is it a crime? That I still want you, and I want you to want me, too?” The harnessed intensity in her voice was arresting. Whatever this love thing was, she was trying to teach me that it was …
4. “Stronger Than Pride.” The lyrics, “I won’t pretend that I intend to stop living. I won’t pretend that I’m good at forgiving, but I can’t hate you …” taught that love sometimes take a bad turn, but it was OK to make an attempt to …
5. “Hang on to Your Love.” Rocky times don’t have to lead to a relationship’s demise, so, “in heaven’s name, why are you walking away? Hang on …” She was willing to fight for it, realizing no matter where you go next, it’s …
6. “Never as Good as the First Time.” She knew the intensity of the first time was a one-time thrill: “Second time is not quite what it seems, natural as the way we came to be, second time won’t live up to the dream, never …” She taught that one should stop and consider the magnitude of loss. I’m now second-guessing my actions, do I stay and fly right? One more plea …
7. “Nothing Can Come Between Us.” She still believed. I had to also, though. It takes two, was the lesson. “I always hope that you remember, what we have is strong and tender. In the middle of the madness, hold on, it’s about faith …” I was starting to come around, but wasn’t quite there yet. She reminded me that what we had was …
8. “No Ordinary Love.” She knew how to weather storms. She cast pride aside and shared, “I keep crying, I keep trying for you. There’s nothing like you and I baby, this is no ordinary love …” She knew so much, because…
9. “Somebody Already Broke Her Heart.” It was her experience that good relationships are worth fighting for and it wasn’t worth starting over with another: “I’ve been hurt so many times before, so I’m counting on you now, somebody already broke my heart …” I caved. I grabbed her up and gave her …
10. “The Kiss of Life.” She relaxed instantly and it was like it was the beginning: “You gave me the kiss that’s like, the kiss of life. Wasn’t it clear from the start, look the sky is full of love…” It was instant devotion, I just needed to come to my senses and genuinely love her. She then vowed to …
11. “Cherish the Day.” She was long on patience and short on quitting: “I cherish the day I won’t go astray, I won’t be afraid, You won’t catch me running.” She taught us what true love can weather, with a little perseverance. The connection that emerged felt like …
12. “Paradise.” We hit our stride and were in the zone: “Feels right, so fine. I’m yours, you’re mine, like paradise …” With undying devotion, she professed …
13. “I Couldn’t Love You More.” I knew she felt it, but she taught me what it means to say it: “I couldn’t love you more boy, Stay exactly how you are …” There’s nothing like positive reinforcement in a relationship, and Sade had it down. And if there were ever any doubt, she assured I’m …
14. “By Your Side.” “If you want to cry, I am here to dry your eyes, and in no time you’ll be fine. You think I’d leave your side baby …?” Non-judgmental support was the lesson there. Through all our trials, she emerged a …
15. “Soldier of Love.” Love is sometimes a battle, but if it’s worth keeping, it’s worth fighting for. “In the front line of this battle of mine, But I’m still alive, I’m a soldier of love.” And I’m still right there with her.
We love Sade because she taught us how to love. –gerald radford
