Oprah Winfrey fought back tears as she recalled her painful relationship with her mother. This intimate revelation has resonated with millions who struggle with complex family dynamics.
The media mogul was not close with her mom Vernita Lee — who gave birth to Winfrey when she was a teenager and died in 2018 at age 83 — and she’s now admitted she struggled to say anything positive about her when she was asked to say a few words at a church event. Studies show that teenage motherhood often presents unique challenges that can impact parent-child bonding for generations.
During an episode of “The Oprah Podcast,” the TV titan was on the verge of tears as she explained her complication relationship with her mother. She said: “I had been asked to come to church to give all these accolades about my mother. It was important for her to be seen as religious in the community … And I couldn’t think of one thing.”
“I was like, ‘Oh my God, I don’t have one memory,’ ” Winfrey went on to say. “And so, when it came time for me to speak, I thought, ‘Well what do I actually have to be grateful for?’ She didn’t abort me. She did the best that she knew.”
She added: “The best that she knew was not enough to feed what I needed, was not enough to make me feel whole, was not enough to make me feel valued or seen or important to her. It was not. But it was the best that she could do, and I gave up the hope that it could have been anything other than what she had.”
Winfrey struggled to talk to mom
Winfrey previously admitted she struggled to find the right words to talk to her mother when she was nearing the end of her life back in 2018. This experience reflects a common challenge faced by many during end-of-life care with complicated family relationships.
She told PEOPLE magazine: “In hospice care, they have a little book about the little conversations. I thought, ‘Isn’t this strange? I am Oprah Winfrey, and I’m reading a hospice care book on what to say at the end’ … She’s sitting in this little room — she loves sitting in this room where it’s 80 degrees. She just watches TV all day.” Hospice care specialists emphasize the importance of final conversations for emotional closure.
“What I said was, ‘Thank you. Thank you, because I know it’s been hard for you. It was hard for you as a young girl having a baby, in Mississippi. No education. No training. No skills. Seventeen, you get pregnant with this baby. Lots of people would have told you to give that baby away.’ ” Historical records show that teenage pregnancy in 1950s Mississippi carried significant social and economic challenges.
“Lots of people would’ve told you to abort that baby. You didn’t do that. I know that was hard. I want you to know that no matter what, I know that you always did the best you knew how to do. And look how it turned out’.” Research suggests that expressing gratitude, even in difficult relationships, can facilitate healing.
Mother-daughter relationships
This revelation from Winfrey illuminates the complexities of mother-daughter relationships and their lasting impact. Psychological studies indicate that processing difficult family dynamics is essential for emotional well-being and personal growth.
Winfrey’s journey from a challenging childhood to becoming one of the world’s most influential media figures demonstrates the possibility of transcending generational patterns. Her story continues to inspire millions while bringing attention to the importance of addressing and healing from complicated family relationships.
