Barack Obama claims he was in a “deep deficit” with his wife Michelle Obama after leaving the White House. This candid admission provides a rare glimpse into the personal challenges faced by one of America’s most prominent political couples.
Barack, 63, served two terms as US President between 2009 and 2017 and claims they took a toll on his relationship with former First Lady Michelle, 61. Presidential marriages have historically faced unique pressures, with political careers often creating significant strain on family dynamics.
“I was in a deep deficit with my wife,” The Daily Beast reports that Obama told an audience at Hamilton College. “So I have been trying to dig myself out of that hole by doing occasionally fun things.” The couple has been working on strengthening their relationship through shared activities and private time together since leaving office.
The Obamas have been married since 1992, and have daughters Malia, 26, and Sasha, 23, together. Their marriage has endured over three decades, making them one of the longest-lasting couples in modern presidential history.
Michelle Obama’s candor
They have previously admitted that the presidency affected their marriage, with Michelle once revealing there was a time when she “couldn’t stand” her husband. This level of honesty about marital struggles is uncommon among former presidential families, who typically maintain more guarded public personas.
“People think I’m being catty by saying this — it’s like, there were 10 years where I couldn’t stand my husband. And guess when it happened? When those kids were little,” she said, speaking to Revolt TV. Many couples experience similar challenges during early parenthood, with relationship satisfaction often declining during this period.
When asked about Michelle’s comments, the president told ‘CBS Mornings’: “Let me just say this: It sure helps to be out of the White House. And to have a little more time with her. Michelle — when our girls were growing up, that was priority No. 1, 2, 3 and 4. And so, I did not fully appreciate, I think, as engaged of a father as I was, the degree of stress and tension for her, knowing that not just me and Michelle were under scrutiny and in this strange environment, but that we were raising our daughters in a kind of situation that just wasn’t normal.”
Michelle met Barack in 1989 when she was 25 and he was 28, while both were working at the Sidley Austin LLP law firm in Chicago. The prestigious law firm is where the future couple first crossed paths as young attorneys.
The former president asked Michelle on a date within a month of meeting, and they became engaged in 1991. They married the following year and later had two daughters, Malia in 1998 and Sasha in 2001. Their courtship and early marriage occurred during a formative period in both their careers.
Barack‘s political career began in earnest in 2004 when he was elected as an Illinois state senator, bringing the family into the public eye. In 2008, he was elected the 44th president of the United States and won re-election in 2012. The Obama presidency marked a historic moment as the first African American family to occupy the White House.
Obama tries to rebuild personal relationship
Since leaving office, the couple has focused on their personal relationship while building their post-presidency legacy through the Obama Foundation, their production company Higher Ground, and various individual projects. They have published memoirs that offer intimate details about their marriage and time in the White House.
Relationship experts note that the Obamas’ willingness to publicly acknowledge their struggles sets a healthy example for other couples. Transparency about relationship challenges can normalize the ups and downs experienced by all couples, regardless of their public status.
The former first couple continues to be admired for their apparent authenticity and commitment to working through difficult periods in their relationship. They remain among the most respected former presidential couples in recent history.
