“The more in love we became, the more dangerous we became
for each other…”
Rihanna’s appearance on “20/20” was six months in the making.
After the brutal events of Feb. 27,
2009, the world has waited with baited breath for the superstar singer to address the
horrendous beating she suffered at the hands of then-boyfriend, R&B star
Chris Brown. When ABC began promoting the first sit-down interview with Rihanna
since that night, millions of Americans set their TiVos. Some wanted to know if
she would reveal the sordid details and bury her former lover’s career in one
fell swoop; others wanted to know if there would be some new detail that painted
the beating in an entirely new light. “I get
very embarrassed … humiliated,” Rihanna said after interviewer Diane Sawyer asked
her about the photos of her battered face appeared online. For most of the
interview, Rihanna spoke more from the perspective of a person who was ashamed
of what the world saw, than from the perspective of a young woman happy to have
freed herself from a dangerous situation.
But, in admitting that she felt ‘humiliated,’ Rihanna
revealed something that many people feel is lacking in celebrities. Rihanna
spoke at length about how she felt she had sent the wrong message to young
women by briefly returning to Brown after the incident. In sharing her “embarrassment,” she acknowledged that she understands she is a role model. Many battered women
are only motivated to leave the abusive situation after their friends and family
become aware of it. Wives are sometimes motivated to leave abusive husbands for
fear of how watching the abuse is affecting their children. Riahanna understood that
other young women in similar situations may have seen her return to Brown as
a validation.
Brown, with his teen idol appeal, was an idealized figure for
many young girls who dreamed of being Rihanna just to be with Brown. She
had to show that no man was worth a woman sacrificing her own safety and
well-being.
But, Brown has his own sympathizers. There are those who immediately
rushed to determine what Rihanna did to just the beating he gave her. There
is an almost knee-jerk reaction among many African Americans to view any
black man in handcuffs as a victim. But there is no room to justify men
exhibiting violent behavior towards women, and we should all remember our
sisters and daughters, and be thankful that Rihanna broke away from a situation
that, for many women, often ends much, much worse. –todd williams
