Dating can often be a scary and frustrating process for singles on the dating scene. The expectations are high but the results are often so disappointing that it leaves many single men and women throwing their hands up to the “dating game.” Most dating singles do not know that there is an art to dating and attracting the right partner. Once you’ve mastered the art, dating turns from dreadful to delightful as you are now equipped with the road map to finding true love. Just remember that dating is like anything else once you get the hang of it. These tips are just an inkling of what I communicate in my books and seminars that will help you navigate through the dating experience and keep your sanity in tact. Follow this advice and you will find yourself appraoching each date with an air of optimism instead of an expectation of disappointment.
So, let’s take a peek at the secret formula for dating. There are five tips to dating success.
1. Do not enter each date expecting to meet your husband.
We are all guilty of it. We want love so badly, that we cross our fingers and hold our breath hoping that we will finally meet “the one” —today. Don’t worry sweetie! If you are following the advice that I give you, you will find “your one.” If you expect and know that soon enough you will meet your perfect partner, you won’t place so many expectations on the date you are on. You can not enjoy someone if you have unrealistic expectations before they have even entered the door. You can not be successful in dating if you do not show up. You can not show up in the present if you are already in the future fantasizing about what he will look like in a white tux on your wedding day. Enjoy your date and leave all expectations at the door and you’ll find that your chances of securing another date are that much better.
2. Relax and enjoy yourself, do not try to prove yourself.
You are just fine exactly the way you are. If it is meant to be, he will like and see the good in you and be willing to give you a chance. Being so nervous that you dominate the conversation and talk his head off about your high profile job or the $500 pair of stiletto shoes you are wearing will only turn him off and leave you with no invitation to a second date. Confidence and being a laid back challenge is attractive. Laugh at his jokes and let him lead the conversation. Try not to force anything, but instead allow the date to flow. This will give him the chance to see the beautiful DIVA you are.
3. Do not cross certain boundaries
Enjoy your date but always remain a lady. You should not be talking about sex on the first date unless you are looking to be thrown out like yesterday’s trash. Men serious about finding a wife do not expect sex too soon. Don’t over drink. A drunk DIVA is so unattractive that he will not only never call you back after the date is over, but he will also act like he never met you if you run into him at the grocery store. Finally, do not get into a debate with him at all. If you see the conversation is headed down that road, change the subject. Do not beat him over the head with your opinions and win the battle only to lose the war of love.
4. Follow your instincts at all times
There is no point in putting yourself in danger only because you failed to follow that small, still voice inside of you that told you at “hello” to leave this guy alone. There is nothing wrong with ending a date you do not feel comfortable with. There is nothing wrong with not accepting a second date from a guy who gives you the creeps! This is the reason why you should never have your date pick you up from your home on the first several dates. Make sure that you know and trust him beyond the shadow of a doubt before allowing him to map quest your address.
5. Be courteous and smile!
There is no need to walk into a date with a chip on your shoulder. This guy may actually be “the one.” Be gracious and smile during your date, even if you find that you are not attracted to him. You never know, you may make a friend for life but how would you know if you scare him off by growling at him? As I stated before, dating is supposed to be fun and something you enjoy. Make sure that your face knows that you are having fun by wearing a smile and you will find that the positive energy you radiate will attract great men to you like flies to honey!
Visit us at www.lovein30days.com and join us for DIVA University to learn more about valuing your “v!”
Shay Williams-Garrett a.k.a. Shay Your Date Diva is the speaker and author of “DIVA Don’t Get Played!” and “Mommy DIVA Don’t Get Played!” both dating guides for catching the man of your dreams in 30 days!
