I heard you made a great first impression last night with the cutie at the bar. But so did Milli Vanilli with “Blame It on the Rain.” And just like those careers were eventually derailed by faking the funk, so too can your chances at a follow-up date be destroyed by a bad first phone call. That’s why I’ve decided to share Five Keys to Mastering the First Phone Call. By following these steps, you’ll leave her restlessly anticipating your next move.
1. Call at the right time.
Most working Americans have jobs that require their full attention during daytime hours. With that being said, your best bet is to call her sometime in the early evening. I always advise people to call before 10 p.m., just in case she goes to bed early.
2. Call from the right place.
Now that you’ve figured out when to call, the next step is to call from the right place. Let’s start off with a few places that you should never call from. Avoid at all costs calling from your job, your car, or your baby mamma’s house during your weekly visitation with your two year-old son, Lil’ Man.
Make sure you’re in a quiet spot where you can devote all of your attention to the matter at hand, and that’s having a great first call.
3. Make great small talk.
The fastest way to kill any chance at taking this thing a step further is to be boring on the first call. So do your best to be interesting and engaging throughout the conversation. Stay away from topics like the weather, politics, or the recent discovery that you’re now lactose intolerant.
Another topic to avoid is past relationships. You’ll have plenty of time to talk about this some other time. So don’t spend those first few moments talking about how your last girlfriend didn’t believe in you, or support your dream to become a professional kickball player. (Don’t worry, I had that same dream.)
4. Have a game plan in mind.
Before you even pick up the phone, have a goal in mind. Make sure you have a date, place, and time ready to suggest for a first date. This shows that you’ve taken the time to think things through. So whether it’s meeting at a chic lounge for drinks, or taking a moonlit ride through the drive-thru at Wendy’s, just let it be known that you do have a plan.
5. Get off the phone as soon as you can.
Now that you’ve locked down a date, it’s time to get off the phone. There’s no need to sit around and discuss the latest episode of “Basketball Wives,” or share your family’s secret recipe for Ravioli Surprise. By letting the phone call linger, you’re setting yourself up to become trapped in the friend zone. So keep things brief and light by limiting the call to 5 to 10 minutes tops.
The Fly Guy Moral: While those tips should provide you with a better perspective when it comes to making that first call, it all means nothing if you lose your cool. So above everything else, just relax and be yourself. That may be the most important key to a successful first phone call.
**DeWayne Rogers is the author of The Fly Guy Chronicles; your in-depth guide to love, relationships and everything hazy in between.
