*Warning some of the language below is disturbing
Angel Haze found the courage to reveal a secret that she has kept since childhood. The female rapper from Brooklyn recently released a new song that details the sexual abuse that she faced as a child. While rapping over Eminem’s “Cleaning Out My Closet” instrumental, Angel Haze gives a vivid account about being raped at the age of 7 years-old.
“When I was seven envision me at the bottom of stairs, and solemnly swear that this is the truth, no fallacy here, see I was young, I was just a toddler, a kid, And he wasn’t the first to successfully try but he did, He took me to the basement and after the lights had been cut, he whipped it out and sodomized and forced his cock through my gut.”
Angel Haze also raps about the emotional damage of the rape and being afraid to tell anyone. “See it was weird because I felt like I was losing my mind, And then it happened like it happened millions of times, And I would swear that I would tell but they would think that I was lying, And now the power that he held was like a beacon of mine, So now I got used to it, I put up with the s–, And now my hate was so volcanically eruptive and s—. ”
She gives another account of being forced to have oral sex with her attacker. “One night he came home and I was asleep in my bed, he climbed on top of me and forced himself between my legs, He told me: ‘Hey, I see you like them popsicle sticks so put your mouth on my d— and swallow the spit.'”
The attacks eventually lead to hurt and rage. “Then I grew up and I wasn’t within the reach of these men, but that didn’t keep me out the motherf—g reach of my sin, and psychologically I was just as f—d as they come…I was afraid of myself, I had no love for myself, I tried to kill, I tried to hide, I tired to run from myself.”
Her confusion on sexuality also lead her to experience with the same sex. “Sexuality came into play and with as scared as I was, I was extremely scared of men so I started liking girls, I started starving myself, f—d up my bodily health, I didn’t want to be attracted to nobody else.”
Angel Haze’s rap is gut-wrenching and should force parents to pay closer attention to their children and who they allow to be around. It’s also important for parents to talk to their kids about sex at an early age and to give their children confidence to speak up when they have endured abuse.
Click continue to listen to Angel Haze’s song “Cleaning Out My Closet.”
