Ivory Shields is an occupational therapist and holistic lifestyle coach, spiritual mindset coach, actress and speaker. Shields has experience as a surrogate mother and spoke with rolling out about Mother’s Day and what it means to her.
What does Mother’s Day mean to you?
Mother’s Day is just really an extension of what we should be doing. Giving homage to the women who came before us, the women who ushered us in, and the surrogate mothers of the world who have been the nurturers, the caretakers, and paying homage to them. I think Mother’s Day is a really special day. I think that all women are mothers in their own right, even if [they] haven’t birthed children. … I think it’s a great day just to pay homage and keep those things in mind, and remember when you’re with your mother, if you still have your mom, or if you’ve lost your mom, to keep that energy up throughout the year.
If you are someone who has lost your mom … just know that energy never dies. Your mother is still with you. Have a conversation with your mother. Even if she’s not here in the physical realm, she’s still with you. I always encourage clients to if their mothers or parents have transitioned, on their birthdays or special days, still have a conversation with them. Buy them a card, write in the card, and write a letter to them letting them know how special they are, and share some good memories.
What tips do you have for women who are not actually mothers?
Be present for those individuals who you are a surrogate mother for. I’m going to get very practical here because this is something that I have to do. My life gets kind of busy. So I write on my schedule when I’m going to reach out to my godchildren. I think that’s a very practical way to stay connected because they get busy. They have their own lives. I get busy and I think that it’s important that you stay connected especially as the elder as the surrogate mother in that relationship. Put it on a schedule to reach out to them, stay open, and listen to them.
