Rashan Toodle is the creator of the clothing brand Bless Energy, which was inspired by the loss of his son at birth. Toodle wanted a way to pay homage to his son, and the first way that came to his mind was spray painting shirts with the message “Bless Energy.”
As Toodle shines his light throughout his brand, he also wants to bring positive energy to others who may be going through difficult times. He spoke with rolling out about the brand, mental health tips for young Black men, and talked about how to grieve.
How did you cope with losing your son?
I knew nobody who ever lost a child, and I knew no one who was as dedicated to God as I was. Not saying that you don’t go to church or you don’t read your Bible, but for me, I always emphasize and edify God in all my rooms, because I had recognized that from when I was a child, I’m connected. I tend to always speak in that manner, but I knew no one who lost a child. My relationship with God was, “Dang, that’s how you feel?” I was extremely lost. God has his own plan so I rolled with it, and the sad part about it is that there were many individuals that didn’t like the way that I turned that darkness into light. They say, “Why didn’t I think of that? Why didn’t I think that when I was going through something?” So then it’s kind of like, what makes you special? But they didn’t know that the darkness that I’ve experienced was able to help me start stepping out.
Why is mental health important for young Black men?
Mental health for Black men is essential because this is how we sustain more so within ourselves. There’s this thing where people say, “I’m just finding myself,” and I find that to be counterintuitive because if you’re finding yourself, in most cases you’re possibly looking outside of yourself. If you’re finding yourself, you’re looking for things that are not necessarily the thing, so what was brought to my attention is even within mental health, remembering who you are is the key, because if you can remember who you are, you’re like, “Aha, this is who I am,” not necessarily I found myself. If you’re always finding yourself, then it means you’re always lost. But if you can find and more so remember the memory of who you are, then in this lifetime, you say, “This is how I remember the way that I move. This is the type of people that I gravitate to; I remember that these are connections that matter to me; I remember that this is who I am.” That DNA that was already inside of us is there. So we’re not finding the DNA; we’re actually activating that DNA.
What advice would you give people grieving lost ones?
What I’ve learned is grieving is just loving that’s continuing. You don’t ever want to stop loving that person, so that’s what grieving is. Do something, I would say, that’s in memory of something that they encouraged you to do, and live that because you’re the energy that’s still alive for them. If they believed in you, still live that.
