Editor’s note: The following op-ed has not been edited. The opinions expressed are solely those of the writer and do not represent the viewpoint of rolling out or Steed Media Group.
Growing up as a good looking African American male in the ghetto I heard the term ” Pretty Boy ” alot. As a kid I found the term offensive for some reason , even though it was said in a way to sound like a compliment. And as I began to analyze the term and take more notice as to how it was being used and the ” type ” of people it was being used to describe I found that it was in fact implicating something more than just looks.
In the black urban culture I found that this term is mostly reserved for attractive light skinned males. And if you notice most of these guys are clean cut , well dressed and alot of them have good hair. Which to alot of blacks signifies ” Pretty ” and in the eyes of blacks pretty is only reserved for women.
I find that alot of urban black women with low self-esteem as well as less attractive black males use this term alot. And when they use the term pretty boy it implise that the person thinks he is all that, and better than most , and alot of times they use it to imply that the man is ” Gay “.
Notably some of our most famous black entertainers like Prince and shemar moore ( in his younger days ) were labled ” Pretty Boys ” which many associated with them being gay. Which led shemar to buckle under the preasure and ” dulled down ” his attractiveness, which I think is the intention behind the term anyway. I believe the term is used to shame a person into nulling down their look because they are getting too much attention which is intimidating to less attractive people or people with low self-esteem.
I also notice that the black entertainment media are projecting an image of a black man that is of a rugged/thuggish type of man. And this image is suppossed to represent what black men should be. And I believe it is these same jealous men and women of low self-esteem within these companies that are pushing this rugged image. And as a result of their influence the black culture is buying into that image , and black women nolonger want to date an attractive clean cut light skinned man. They want a ” Thug Type ” which is usually a less attractive dark skinned man – and Why ?
It is because the pretty boy has been labled ” Soft ” and arrogant , simply because he takes pride in his appearance and is proud of his natural beauty. He has been labled as someone who dones’nt want to work because he is too pretty to work. He has been outcast by the black community and this is why you see more of these guys with women of other races because they tend to love beautiful men.
Among jealous less attractive black men and black women with low self esteem the pretty boys envokes envy and imitates them and that has created hatred. So they have collaberated together and isolated pretty boys with stigmas and raised up the less attractive man ( Who is simply non-treating to their fragile ego )and this was done to make the pretty boy feel as though his looks are worthless. Because in the black community the woman is the only one that feels she can showcase beauty. And she is intimidated by a man that can rival her in the spotlight, therefore she would date and marry a less attractive man to feel comfortable in her own skin.
While in the white culture beauty whether male or female is celebrated and showcased for the world to see. People Magazine picks men to be named the most beautiful man in the world, and their looks have nothing to do with their sexuality or strength as a man. And it should’nt have anything to do with it, but alot of blacks feel it does. Or is this conspiracy to make the pretty boys look less desirable just a cover to hide the fact that it is just a matter of pure jealousy? Jealous of the self-esteem that comes along with being pretty. –king nazir muhammad
