Gabrielle Union has admitted that she was “scared” when she welcomed her daughter Kaavia into the world last year.
In honor of the tot’s first birthday, Union has taken to Instagram to share a heartfelt tribute, in which she admits she was terrified of being labeled a “failure” for having “no clue” what to do as a new mother.
With a slideshow of pictures of Kaavia in the background set to “Lovely Day” by Bill Withers, Union wrote:
“Scared to hold you. Scared to burp you. Scared to reveal I have no clue what I’m doing. Scared to go to work. Scared to stay home. Scared when you sleep. Scared when you wake up. Scared I’m not living up to some impossible standard of motherhood. Scared I’d lose myself. Scared I’d be exposed as a failure, as less than, not as good as, not as comfortable as, not as … anything.”
The “Being Mary Jane” actress went on to credit her daughter with allowing her to “let go” of her fears, as she said she is celebrating her tot now that she’s learned to “just enjoy” her time with Kaavia.
“But there you were, every day, looking up at me, like “gurl, you got this!” When I let go of my fears of judgment and just did my best and recognized that my best would and could change from day to day and life would magically go on … Man, I finally allowed myself to just enjoy you @kaaviajames and relax into the peace of imperfection. One year in and your whole village stays smiling. The family you know and all the cyber aunties and uncles you may never meet, we celebrate you,” Union continued.