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Is there ever a point to fighting for a relationship?

black couple

Photo credit: iofoto / Shutterstock.com

When you realize that the person you are with is interested in someone else, there are truly only a few options. Some people convince themselves that their mate is merely having sex with someone else without having feelings attached. They believe that as long as they have the strings on the person’s heart, that is all that matters. They convince themselves that it is a phase and their partner will outgrow it and come to their senses. They will make that same argument over and over again, cheating spell after cheating spell. That is the first option: falling back and letting them “do their thing.”

The second option is competing to regain their mate’s attention. This is also known as “fighting for a relationship.” It is a low point to sink where you feel like you have to enter into a gladiator arena to engage in a battle to the death over someone who has split their time and attention between you and someone else. Yet, millions of people worldwide sink to this level yearly. They feel like they have invested too much of their lives to give up. They believe that if they love harder, sex harder, or provide more material things, everything will go back to normal. But their sense of normalcy is being disrespected, disregarded and degraded. Even if they win the battle, there is little to no chance of them winning the war. That is not what love is supposed to be about.

The third option is to leave the relationship altogether, take some time to heal, and start anew in peace. This is the one that I suggest because the other two will only lead to ongoing drama, heartache, and disappointment. There are some things in life that are worse than being alone, like constantly being mistreated by another human being who may profess to love you but whose actions speak otherwise.

Most people will stay and choose one of the first two options. They will either turn the other cheek and wait at home for their mates to return from a roll in the hay will someone else, or they will try to out-sex or present a better choice than their competition. Have you ever found yourself in that predicament? Which option did you choose?