Dear Black men: We need you

Society beats us down the same way it does the Black man. The American Dream hasn’t only passed you by, but it’s steamrolled over us. Yet we continue to stand by you while protesting takes place in the streets against police brutality but havoc rings out in our homes. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, a woman is more likely to be killed by her spouse than a stranger. The Violence Policy Center reported that in 2017, 289 women were shot and killed by their husband or intimate partner during an argument. These astounding statistics are alarming and heart-wrenching. We need you now more than ever.

Racism coupled with sexism has left the Black woman on the outside looking in. Our exposure to unfair and neglectful treatment has resulted in feelings of abandonment and frustration. We stand behind you, but are you standing behind us?


Let’s be clear, this isn’t a new phenomenon for Black women. In 1971, the acclaimed Nikki Giovanni had a televised conversation with James Baldwin in which she described the harsh realism that Black women face from Black men. Giovanni stated, “you lie when you smile at the ‘cracka’ at the job. Lie to me. Smile. Treat me the same way you’d treat him.”

Dear Black men, it’s time for us to no longer be an afterthought. We are daughters, mothers, and grandmothers. We need you just like you need us. Acknowledge our pain and address our issues. Above all, we are much better together than apart.


Anissa D. Blair is an Atlanta-based author and blogger with a passion for writing and being a mother and wife. In her blog, “Straight, No Chaser,” she represents everyday women “just trying to cope doing average s—” and covers all topics — from the good, the bad and the ugly of navigating through life’s obstacles and roadblocks, to building and keeping successful relationships while trying to maintain your sanity. No taboo topics here. You can read her work at rollingout.com/anissa/ and follow her on social media @anissadblair on Instagram and @anissablair on Facebook.

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