Letting go of toxic people, including your mother

Letting go of toxic people, including your mother
(Photo credit: Shutterstock.com / WAYHOME studio)

Almost everyone has muttered the words, “I hate my mother,” or “I can’t stand her.” Even the best relationships between a mother and daughter have their issues. But what if your conflicts go beyond the norm and you can’t stand the ground she walks on?

In the latest episode of “Iyanla: Fix My Life,” Iyanla Vanzant attempts to reconcile the relationship between LisaRaye McCoy and her mother. The betrayal ran deep, with both sides defending their stances. Communication broke down, and being right ruled the conversation. A toxic relationship with a foundation of anger and hurt feelings ultimately will manifest into hate and disrespect.


In a perfect world, a mother’s love is unyielding and unconditional. The dynamics between a mother and daughter can be loving or an absolute failure. But what if you two can’t be in the same room with each other without yelling and screaming?

If you feel as though you’ve been wronged or mistreated, repairing that relationship can be impossible. And, naturally, your gut reaction to your mother’s animosity is fueled by hatred and hostility.


Letting go of toxic people, including your mother

Growing up, sitcoms like “The Cosby Show” and “A Different World” were a constant in most Black homes. Clair Huxtable, the family’s matriarch, received nothing but admiration, respect and love from her on-screen daughters Denise, Vanessa and Sondra.

Yet, in your home, bickering and fighting may be the only acceptable forms of communication. You’ve tried to take the high road and sacrifice your well-being in a failed attempt to “do the right thing,” despite being left holding the bag. Now your options are to either choose your mother’s toxicity or cut her off completely.

Sound familiar?

Continue reading on the next page.

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Anissa Blair
Writing is my passion but being a mother and wife are definitely important too. I decided to start a blog that represented everyday women just trying to cope doing average sh--. Nothing out of the ordinary; unless you count trying to juggle a career with a family. I'm that woman that has failed more times than she cares to count, but consciously decided to say what the he--; let me try it AGAIN! I proudly proclaim that I’m 40 something and a happily married woman (I’m not bragging but I’m on my third marriage) with three beautiful children. I can scream from the mountaintop that I finally got it RIGHT! I’ve kissed quite a few frogs to get to my Prince Charming. I plan on discussing all topics, the good-the bad and the ugly related to navigating through life’s obstacles and road blocks into building and keeping successful relationships while trying to maintain your sanity. No taboo topics here.
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